Option 3 might be best if you use sef advance, to be honest i use m2ks solution, so i have made this hack work around 404sef rather than sef advance.
The best thing to do is experiment around with the hack , because it will allow you to have long titles in any of the fields for any content items (sections, categories or items). you just have to know which fields to hack, if you know which field sef advance is using for the url's you can make the hack use the other field and exclude the long title from anywhere that it is showing up eg, menu items or modules. it just a process of elimination.
The only problems i found were that the modules like latest news would display the long titles, so i used the hack in the modules to get rid of the long title.
There were also problems in the backend admin, when i went to move items, the long urls would display which would break the admin template.
however, i have fully hacked a version of mambo, to do everything i want with the titles and the backend is hacked as well to display the short titles.
Everything seems to work perfectly. there is probably over 40 places to hack in total, but it does the trick.
I might post it up here if i have the time.
anyway good luck with ur titles
